Baby boy has arrived. We call him Viggo. Silas calls him Lego. I guess in his head it’s the same 🙂 although he is harder to play with at the moment. He is so small compared to Silas, who now seems gigantic! I had read that this would happen and it is actually true. It is especially funny when I change Viggo’s nappy and then Silas’ nappy afterwards. Silas seems way to big to still use nappies. We had sort of started toilet training Silas, but we are pausing now as becoming a big brother is change enough right now. He seems to be handling it quite well. Especially now that I can take care of him more and more.
Just before birth when I was way too big and after birth when I was recovering, it was very hard to take care of Silas and obviously he was mad and sad. I was mad and sad! I missed him terribly and I’m guessing he missed me terribly too. However, as I said the more I recover, the more I can take care of Silas again and the happier we both are and the more accepting of Viggo he is. I sense he is going to be a great big brother! We are still getting to know Viggo, and he us, so it remains to be discovered what kind of little brother he will become. A great one, I am sure, but now he is only 2,5 weeks old.
I am getting used to sleepless nights and constant feeding and nappy change. In my next life I want to be a man! Although Baby-daddy is quite helpful and I wouldn’t want to do this without him. Single parents must be superhuman or something, otherwise I don’t see how they manage. We also have 3 grandparents close by to help out and I still find it hard. There are so many expats here in Luxembourg who are all alone and they must be superhuman as well. Especially those with several children. One is hard enough, add a second or third and a village is needed! Gladly, I have the feeling that, at least the English speaking, expat community is very helpful and nobody should be feeling alone.
It’s just about asking for help, which for many people is quite hard to do. For me it’s really easy. I am very good at delegating, so good in fact that I often end up doing nothing. Family and friends don’t like me very much for that, but I find it quite practical 😉 Don’t be afraid to ask for help. People usually want to help and it’s so much easier for them, if they know what they can do for you. Just the other day, a friend came by to see the baby and within 10 minutes, she was hanging my laundry while I was feeding 🙂
For emotional support though, I have a hard time asking for help. When I am sad, I prefer to deal with it alone as supposed to talking to a friend. I know this is not ideal and I wish I would be better at calling up a friend to talk. This is something I would like to work on this year!
It can be quite lonely in the beginning with a newborn baby. It is hard or complicated to leave the house. It has to fit the baby’s feeding and nap schedule and you have to remember all the stuff to bring. If you are a practical person like me, you also need to plan the outing so that you always have access to a place to feed and change the baby should this be necessary. And finally you have to be fresh enough to want to leave the house.
So unless your friends come to your house, it is quite a daunting task to see friends. The crazy Danes have come up with a brilliant concept they call “Spis og Skrid” or “SOS”, literally translated means “eat and piss off”. It means guests come, guests eat and guests leave. This way you can still see your friends and you don’t mess with the children’s bedtime.
We had such a night last Friday. Our friends came, we ate and they left. Bedtime was only moved a little bit and mommy could go to bed early as well. Having a baby or having children does not mean you have to stop living. You can still do pretty much the same things as before, with a little planning and adjustments it is possible.
Although I do miss a good glass of wine and getting a little tipsy among good friends!
All in good time, all in good time my friend.
Have a great week and next time you enjoy a glass of wine, shout out a small “skål” for me!