Should I be punished for leaving?

I finally had my weekend away and boy that was needed. You may remember how tired I was feeling last month and how I hated to be a mother in that moment!

I received so much nice feedback from that blog post that I wanted to give you an update about how it was and how I am feeling. And I sincerely hope you all have booked YOUR time away! Have you?

I came home and was still a little lost the first few days. I didn’t really want to do anything or to think anything. I was very calm. The kids were their usual self but I stayed calm which benefitted them so much. Whenever their father would raise his voice I would take over in my very calm state and solve the situation in a very calm manner. It was great.

I spent some wonderful days in beautiful surroundings with wonderful friends. We talk so much and solved all the worlds’ crises! It was very therapeutic. We spent time in a spa and had nice food and of course lots of drinks!

It was wonderful.

Unfortunately this feeling doesn’t last. After a few days or weeks we go back to being stressed out and start raising our voices again. It is not our fault, this just happens. We get tired, we lose patience, we forget.

This is why it is so important to regularly take time for you. You don’t have to go away every other weekend although you may be thinking that this is what you need to really feel relaxed after years of stress. It doesn’t have to be excessive. Nobody has time or money for that! But you do need to book in some “me-time” from time to time This can be anything that you like doing. Going for a walk, getting a manicure or just a nice conversation with a friend. Anything you want, but you NEED to do it!

We get so lost in all our daily to-do lists because being a parent is a non-stop job! It never stops! Even when they grow up and move out of the house. It just never stops! This is a good thing. This is (hopefully) why we became parents. But you cannot forget yourself in this process.

While I was away I was worried that the kids would “punish” me after I came back. They normally do that. They act out in each their own way. One kid acts out on not wanting to eat anything and the other stops sleeping. This is the way they silently “punish” me for not being around. I was dreading it, but I learnt something truly valuable. This time around I learnt that they are not acting out on me for not being there, they act out on me feeling guilty for leaving them!

Woaw! What a revelation! This time I came back without any guilt. I came back with a refreshed caring mind. I came back with love. I enjoyed myself to the fullest and was recharged!

And guess what. No “punishment” Great!

This just goes to show how important it is for everyone involved that we take care of ourselves. Taking care of yourself is not only for you, but for your kids and for your partner! The kids love seeing this new energized happy mother! And they really enjoyed some time alone with daddy!

Total win win!

Now it’s your turn! No more excuses! Please go book your weekend away or schedule in some me-time. Do it now! Let me know what you come up with in the comments below!

 

Are you a mom? Want to learn how to take better care of yourself?

When we become mothers we are so good at taking care of everyone else and we completely forget ourselves and our needs! This is not about being selfish, this is about not pouring from an empty cup.

When we take care of ourselves we become much better moms, partners, daughters, sisters and workers.

Let me teach you how and grab your free ebook about my journey and what made it all turn around.

Just click here: –>> http://bit.ly/getrealwithanne

Want to meet me?

I am hosting a series of free events to talk about life, health and wellbeing. See more here: www.facebook.com/events/319378295196837

Why I hate being a mother!

Do you remember a few months ago I told you I was writing a book? Click here if you aren’t sure! The plan was to write all the content this summer. It was going really good in the beginning, but somewhere along the way, the book became less and less of a priority! I kept finding excuses for not writing. There was always something else that felt more important.

Yesterday one of my friends asked me about it and I was embarrassed to admit that the book has been put on hold. That is really what is happening. Sometimes you don’t know whether something is true or not before you have said it out loud.

After admitting it, I was trying to figure out why! I am a coach after all! I wanted to get to the bottom of it. It happens that said friend is also a coach, so she was curious too. We started asking and answering questions as we do while listening intently and this is what I realised:

My book is about motherhood and that it is ok to admit that it is hard. The book contains the story of my personal journey into motherhood and how it all changed my life. First to the worst, but then to the better! I finish by explaining in depth the several steps I recommend every mother to go through in order to live her best life possible and to be the confident, great feeling person she deserves to be. These steps are easy but I believe they are so important yet many mothers I know have yet to go through them! The book is obviously also about how much I love my children and how I love being a mother… blablabla…. And this is where I stop!

And here comes my big and daring statement: At this moment, at this very moment when I am writing, I hate being a mother and I wish I  never had children!

 

There it is – it is out there! It is a bold and honestly a quite scary statement.

 

Now before you go off and judge, please understand that I mean this in this very moment. Not all the time, but right now! I love my children dearly and I wouldn’t want my life to be in any other way, except for right now!

Saying it out loud to my friend yesterday felt really good and was such a relief. She laughed and said “well, that should go in your book!”. Ha-ha, the irony! She said I should call it a sh*t Chapter! Well, here is my sh*t blog post about it!

There is nothing wrong with my kids and they are not more hard work than any other kids. They are just normal kids with their normal kids behaviour! They have tantrums, they cry for no good reason – oh boy how I hate this!!! – they fight with each other, they fight over moms attention, they are just being normal small boys.

I long for the days when they don’t need me as much and I can actually have a normal conversation with an adult. Although when this will happen I know that I will miss the days when they were fighting over who gets to hold mommy’s hand!

**SIGH**

So what can I do about it? I am not going to sit here with all these feelings and not do something about it. That is just not who I am.

For starters I am going to put my book on hold for a little while and not stress over it. Then I am going to meditate, because meditation just feels good! I am usually in another hemisphere on the days when I meditate.

Another thing I do, or I did, is I went to one of my favourite yoga classes this week. Oh, this also felt so yummy!

Finally the Gods must have knows that I was going to feel this way because months ago I planned a girls weekend away which is happening this coming weekend! How lucky am I? At first I was nervous and worried for leaving my babies – how will they cope without me but now I am so looking forward to going away. Not only will I get some real quality friend time, but I will also get free time away from the kids. Away from little people yelling “mommy, mommy, mommy”. Oh boy, if I had a cent each time they said mommy!!

So this weekend I will trust that my boys are in good hands and are fine, even without mommy and I will enjoy myself to the fullest. I will be fully present knowing that I am doing something GOOD for myself! It is about time! It is about time that I start following the recommendations I give my clients and that I write about in my book.

My hope is that this weekend will give me the strength to finally finish it. Wish me luck and stay tuned!!!

5 steps to avoid drowsiness after lunch!

Do you know the feeling, when you get really tired after lunch? You’ve just had a big lunch, feeling really good about yourself and you are ready to face an afternoon full of delicious work challenges.

And then it hits you! You get tired, your eyes start closing and you may even be a little grumpy.

Do you know that feeling?

Why does this happen? Well, the short story is that you body is digesting the food you ate and most likely you are experiencing a sugar crash. There can be other causes, such as just plain tired if you haven’t slept well in a while or something else that is nagging at your life.

But no matter the cause, what do you do in these situations?

I used to (I still sometimes) grab the first sugary treat I could find and down it with some coffee! I am sure some of you do or have done that too!

Unfortunately this is the worst thing you can do! If you are experiencing a sugar crash, then adding more sugar is like adding insult to injury.

But what can you do instead? Here are 5 suggestions.

1 – Avoid refined sugar. If you are experiencing a sugar crash, then avoiding sugar for lunch, will avoid the crash! Easy, no? 😉

2 – If you are still experiencing this classic fatigue, even without sugar, then maybe it is a different kind of sugar. CARBS! Carbohydrates are also a type of sugar and will also lead to sugar crashes! This one is hard to avoid, since the most common quick lunch is a sandwich! Try to avoid eating bread and have a salad instead!

3 – If you are already avoiding these two foods but you are still getting tired after lunch, then try to have a nap! Sometimes we are just tired and a 20 min nap can work wonders. So if you are in a position to take a nap, then do it! Even nodding off in a conference room at the office can work. A trick to avoid falling deeply asleep is to hold your keys in your hand. When your body is falling a sleep you will drop the keys and hopefully the noise will wake you up. At this point you should get up and feel more energized. Do a few stretches and you are good to go!

4 – Talking about stretches: a good way to get over the nagging sleepiness in the afternoon is to move! Do some stretches, go for a walk or take a fitness class! Your body will feel more energized afterwards! I promise you. So even if this is the last thing you want to do, give yourself a kick in the butt and off you go!

5 – If none of these things work, then try talking to someone. Maybe you just need a different perspective and change of pace or a friendly conversation with someone. People can give you so much energy, it is amazing. Try it!

So, what do you think? Can you try some of these? Do you have other ideas?

 

 

This article was also published on healthylux.com. I am a passionate contributor to HealthyLux.

http://www.healthylux.com/five-actions-avoid-drowsiness-lunch/

Bikini Season is upon us! Are you ready?

My mother in law loves taking lots of pictures of us on holiday, including pictures of me in my bikini by the pool! I still remember the first time we went on holiday together and she was taking photos of me. I didn’t like it one bit. She likes “in the action” photos, so most of the time I didn’t even know she was taking them. I had to reassure that she would not post any of them on Facebook!! She promised she wouldn’t. I actually just wanted to burn (delete) them!

This year however, things were different. In March we went on holiday together and again she was taking lots of pictures. This time, when going through them I wasn’t all grossed out about seeing me in a bikini!

YAY!

First of all, what a terrible thing to think about myself! Is it really that bad to look at my own body? Well yes it is! And I am sure I am not alone! But really! Would we say that we are grossed out about seeing our best friend in a bikini if she is a little bulky and overweight? I recon not!

Second of all, did my body really change that much? I have lost some weight but I am surely not skinny and I do not look like the woman in the picture.

So what has changed?

 

My confidence and how I view myself has changed! All the holistic work I am doing for myself is really working! I am so happy that I am finally accepting and loving my body the way it is.

Here is the good news! So can you!

If you are unable to look at yourself in the mirror and hate seeing photos of yourself, especially in a bikini, you too can start to love yourself, just the way you are! You are worthy of love and you are beautiful!

 

Here are 5 small things you can do start loving your body:

  1. Take a yoga class.  Doing yoga forces you to connect with your body in a different way and you will start to see your body differently.
  2. Get to know Louise Hay! Click here to listen to one of her many lectures or guided meditations you can find on youtube.
  3. Schedule something good for yourself at least once a week. It can be a massage or other treatment, try something new like Reiki, go for a walk, reconnect with a friend – anything that makes you happy! Go on, schedule it in now!
  4. Eat more vegetables! When you fuel your body with delicious nutrients, vitamins and minerals, your body will glow and you will start feeling different.
  5. Stop comparing yourself to others! You are and look the way you look and that’s the end of it! Cherish yourself! You are worthy!

Oh dear, there are so many more, it is hard to choose just 5! Be good to yourself! How do you expect other people to love you if you don’t love yourself? You can start now!

Let me know in the comments below which one thing you will do today to love yourself more?

 

My approach to a healthy lifestyle!

Approximately once a month I dedicate some time to write articles for this website: healthylux.com

You can see some of my past articles here:

Healthylux is a directory to find anything health related in Luxembourg including a place you can find all health practitioners, instructors and so on. Read more about the website here: Let’s get healthy together!

Last month they interviewed me on my approach to healthy living. I think it came out pretty good. What do you think?

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Click here to view full article.

 

I hope you found some inspiration to Start your Health Journey? If you need some inspiration to find Healthy Snacks, I have 20 different ideas to give to you for free. Just click here to get them!

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Click here, it’s free

 

 

The worst thing about eating healthy?

I am a big believer of adding in as opposed to restricting yourself and taking things out of your diet. The funny thing is that after a while, the more healthy things you put in your diet, the unhealthy snacks and other processed foods seem to fill your cupboards less and less. (more on that later 😉 )

This is a great thing you must think! And yes it is most of the time!

Except for those times where you really want to indulge in something. Those times where you think “oh my, it would be so nice with _______ fill in the blank.” Something you know you shouldn’t eat every day but would be sooo nice once in a while!

The problem with this new healthy lifestyle is that these unhealthy treats are no longer to be found in my cupboards!!! It is so frustrating!

But it is also the point of the matter, isn’t it! 😉

The less of those things you find in your house the less likely you will eat it, right? You have to actually move out of the house to go buy whatever it is you want! In the end I usually replace whatever snack I want to have with something either a healthier snack or a healthier habit (that can also feed your soul).

For me it is usually something sweet I crave. Just now as I am writing I really wanted a chocolate bar, but I know how much crap there are in these things and I really don’t want to put them into my body. Instead I had a little jam on my cheese sandwich (yes, we do do that…) and I went to get myself a hug from a loved one.

*Poof* craving gone!

What snack do you find it very hard to live without? How do you think it would feel if you simply stopped buying it? Would you eat it less? Or not at all? Let me know in the comments below!

Brrrr

Last year when the weather started to be colder I realised something weird. For the first time I was really cold! It felt that no matter what I did, I kept being cold! I would wear bigger jackets. I would exercise more. I was even given an electric heating blanket for Christmas! I was just cold!!

This was also the first fall where I was losing weight.

Could it be that for the first time I didn’t have an insulated heating layer that was my own fat and skin? Could it be that because I was now thinner and my blood closer to the cold or something? Could this be the reason I was so freaking cold?

I don’t know, but what I do know is what I did about it!

I tried to figure out if there was something in my diet that could help the situation. Was I low on some vitamins or did I lack proteins because I had stopped eating meat?

This is when I started to notice a particular pattern! See if you can see it yourself:

I eat cereal or yoghurt for breakfast. I love eating salads or healthy sandwiches for lunch. Evenings was usually pasta with vegetables in one way or other.

Did you notice it?

There is hardly any warm food! Only dinner seem to be cooked food. David Wolfe from the raw food movement would be thrilled! However when you live in a cold climate like we do, eating cold foods all year long just doesn’t work!

So I started to eat more warm foods! I started eating soups or some other warm meal for lunch. The soups were amazing, because they are also a really easy way to get more veggies into your diet! And you can make a whole batch during the weekend that will last you all week!

Lo and behold, it did the trick. I did have to remind myself each time I chose my food. I would look at the delicious salads or other colds foods and respectfully decline. I had to learn to order soups in restaurants for lunch!

Not just food, but also drinks! I drank more warm teas instead of cold drinks.

It seems like such a first world problem, but I am sure I am not alone here.

I invite you to listen more to your body and try to find out what it is really asking for! My body was clearly asking for more heat!

Spring is on its way! Let’s hope for a warm one!

 

Want to know how I lost the weight? Next Tuesday 28 March I will be live on Facebook and share 3 easy steps you can start doing immediately and you will see results right away! All you have to do it join my Facebook Group Let’s Get Real Together and tune in at 19h30 CET on Tuesday 28 March. Click “going” in this event so you don’t miss it! Click here.

Health Expert Series 6

Welcome to the 6th edition of my Health Series!

This month we have the pleasure of our wonderful Marise Hyman from Marise Hyman Maternity Coaching. If you are an English speaking mom or pregnant lady, then I am sure you have heard of her. Well, do you know what her views on health are? Look no further, read here!

 

Here we go:

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Name, age, occupation: Marise Hyman, 38, Holistic Maternity & Sleep Coach/Educator – Marise Hyman Maternity Coaching. Founder & Birth Advocate – Luxmama Club & ParentPrep asbl

What does health mean to you?

Health to me means being resilient to what life throws at you. Everything is interconnected, much more than we think! Therefore, fostering a healthy approach to life impacts not only yourself but also your environment and the people around you. 

How do you achieve this level of healthy?

By following an integrative or holistic approach to life. Where body, mind and spirit is nurtured and living in harmony and flow with the environment around you. Realising that the body is self-healing and ever-changing, just like nature. We are nature! Understanding that anything you put in your mouth, put on your skin, inhale through your nose and create in your mind influences health. Rather being curious to new discoveries in science than feeling overwhelmed. As essential as the physical part is to health, acknowledging the underestimated role thoughts and emotions play in shaping your reality and ultimately health. And lastly, moving your body in ways that feel good.

Why is it important to be and live healthily?

To be alive is a GIFT.

Respecting and nurturing this gift just feels right to me.

This wasn’t always my attitude. I have gone through times when I took life, my body and the environment around me for granted. Becoming a parent and taking stock of who I am in the world and my place in it, has changed ALL THAT in a big way. 

Why are you an expert?

I won’t call myself a “Health Expert”…

Following an exhausting 18-year corporate career filled with sweat and tears, I analysed my life when becoming a mother and awoken to the realisation that life is more than just deadlines and material things. The challenging transition parents in the Western world experience compared to how traditional cultures approach this sacred rite of passage fascinated my so much, I fell in love with the “transition into parenthood” and made it my mission to support parents going through it.

I started my own business coaching and educating expecting and new parents worldwide after qualifying as Holistic Pregnancy & Child Sleep Practitioner and Holistic Perinatal Educator/coach, Happiest Baby on the Block educator and soon-to-be “Becoming Us”-facilitator.

I also developed the desire to create positive change within my community and as a result, the Luxmama Club & ParentPrep asbl was born, a volunteer-run organisation by the community, for the community raising awareness for green, natural & holistic parenting alternatives, birth rights and perinatal mood disorders by offering a variety of inspiring social and educational events in Luxembourg.

What is your top health tip?

Listen to your body, it’s always communicating with you. Be kind to yourself and others. Say no when it’s not for you. Do things that bring you joy.

 

Great tips! Say no! I love it! Live life holistically! Thank you so much Marise!

If you would like to meet Marise, then join us for this weeks Bellies and Booties event. This Thursday 16th March she will be our special guest and explaining all about Emotional Well-being, Baby and Holistic Sleep. Don’t miss this great opportunity! I will be there too 😉 See Facebook event for more details.